I've always wondered if there will ever be a time in my life when change will become a positive thing. For some reason i've always assosiated it with something negative; like moving up a year in school and realising just how many exams you now how to study for. I guess, having arrived at university, this is the first time i've ever considered that change could be a good thing. I've always been a real homebird and my family mean so much to me so moving away was always going to be a daunting prospect.With the weeks quickly passing and the dreaded date approaching i knew i was soon going to leave the town i had grown up in and the family and friends i've known all my life. I suppose the problem was that i couldn't imagine my life without seeing my family ever day and without being able to pop over to friend's houses whenever i fancied. It soon hit me that we soon had to grow up, we were all moving to places which were completely unfamiliar to us and were being hauled out of our comfort zones and thrown into a new environment with no choice but to get used to it! I felt settled, comfortable and happy with my life; why should i have to leave all that behind?
The problem was that i couldn't picture coming to university as being a good thing, i focused on all the negative aspects and concentrated on everything that i was going to lose rather than what i was going to gain. I spent my first week sad and lonely, unwilling to try and make it work and stubbornly refusing to make the best out of the situation. I didn't want to have to make new friends, i was happy with the friends i had. I didn't want to go out because i wasn't going to bump into anyone i knew and wasn't going to recognize anything around me. I had gotten myself in a rut and had convinced myself that university wasn't for me.
It wasn't until i returned home for the first time, having been away for three weeks, that i realised i had been completely naive and narrow-minded. I had let the fear of the unknown, and fear of change consume me and had forgotten my reasoning for coming to university in the first place. I had forgotten about the top class education i was about to receive, the new skills i was going to learn and the new knowledge which could only make me a better person. As i stood in my kitchen and looked around me i realised that nothing i was looking at was mine. The two cars on the drive-way weren't mine, the leather sofas and plasma television; these weren't mine. It was at this moment that i realised that this is what i wanted. I wanted everything that i was surrounded with but i wanted to be able to call it my own. I realised that coming to university is such a huge opportunity for me; i was being given the chance to fulfill all my ambitions and dreams but i hadn't been able to see this before. Upon looking around me a feeling of pride came over me; i was so proud of my mum and dad for achieving all that they have achieved and it was then that i knew it was time for a change; a positive change.
